My Father’s Day was spent with my boys, watching the original Star Wars trilogy.

I slept in pretty late Sunday morning while the boys played peacefully in their rooms. Now, I didn’t actually sleep straight all morning: Calfgrit6 woke me up at 6:30, but I waved him off to go play his Nintendo DS in his room until his brother woke up. I fell back to sleep until Calfgrit10 woke up around 8:00. I gave them both permission to just continue playing DS until I got up. (Playing DS in the morning is a very unusual activity, so they both were quite happy to leave me alone for as long as I would let them.) I fell in and out of sleep for another hour, and then got up to check on them. I told them to turn off their DSs and just play whatever else they wanted while I “rested” some more.

I went back to bed and turned on the bedroom TV. While I laid lazily in bed, in unusual peace and quiet, and watched some Law and Order, the boys went downstairs and made their own breakfast. They’re both capable of getting bagels or cereal and even toasting Eggos — they’ve done it many times before — so I didn’t worry about them. My bedroom door was open enough that if something happened, I’d hear it. But nothing disturbed me for another hour, and then I decided it was time to get on up and take a shower.

I took a nice long, 30-minute hot shower, and took another half hour to eventually get dressed. By then, it was nearing 11:00, so I announced we’d go to CiCi’s pizza buffet for an early lunch. “Yays!” all around. While sitting together stuffing our faces with pizza, we discussed what we should do on this day for dads. We decided to watch all three original Star Wars movies. “Yays!” all around.

When we got home, I had them clean up their toys scattered about the upstairs hall and loft while I put in the first video tape — yes, I own the original trilogy, (not the Special Edition edits), on VHS tape. When the boys came downstairs, we sat on the sofa and matching chair and watched the A New Hope and Empire Strikes Back one right after the other. Then we went out to Moe’s Mexican Grill for tacos as dinner.

We wasted no time after eating, and came right back home for Return of the Jedi. After the third movie, it was time to get ready for bed. The boys were cooperative and peaceful with the whole process, and I was soon ready for bed, myself.

Before hitting the sack, I went through the comic book boxes in my closet and pulled out a handful of old Spider-Man books. I spent the last couple hours of the night reading those old stories. Then I turned out the light and went to sleep.

It was a pretty decent Father’s Day.

Bullgrit

Calfgrit10 has shown interest in a lot of my D&D paraphernalia laying and hanging about my home office. I’ve given him some vague descriptions of D&D, but I’ve never played it with him nor given him a rulebook to read about it. Not that I haven’t wanted to, I’ve just been waiting for an appropriate level of maturity. I think he’s reached that maturity, now. So I told him to think of who he’d like to invite over for an afternoon introduction to the wonderful world of Dungeons & Dragons adventure.

He immediately had one particular friend in mind, so I noted him. Then he thought for a minute and gave me another friend’s name, and I noted him. Then he thought for another minute, and this time I suggested a friend’s name, which he agreed to, and I noted him. That would be four boys in total — a good number that maybe I could handle. I’ve run a D&D game many times through the years, but it’s been since never that I’ve done it for a group of 10 year olds. Especially a group of 10 year olds who have never been exposed to a table-top role playing game.

The boy whom I suggested, I know his father is/used to be a gamer similar to me, (we’ve briefly talked about it when our boys were hanging out together). I knew before I asked Calfgrit10, that I wanted to invite that dad and boy to join us. Not only would another classic gamer be sharing in a little nostalgia with our sons, but maybe having another dad present would make it easier for me to control the game. And I was glad that CG10 immediately agreed.

Once I got Calfgrit’s list of friends to invite, I gave thought to what edition of D&D did I want to run for them. Third edition is my personal preference for D&D gaming, but it’s too complicated for what is essentially a simple pick-up game. D&D3 is great for campaign-length gaming, but Basic D&D (1981 edition) is probably better for simple, introductory one-shot games. So I decided to run Basic D&D. And I’ll use the classic adventure module, In Search of the Unknown — the adventure module that served as my own personal first introduction to the game. The more I thought about this whole thing over the next several days, the more excited I got about it.

Maybe it could salve my disappointment over the last time I tried this with my adult game group:

• I’m Going to Run a Basic D&D Adventure
• Basic D&D Game Session — Creating the Characters
• Basic D&D Game Session — Enter the Dungeon
• Basic D&D Game Session — Re-entering the Dungeon

I sent emails to the three boys’ parents, explaining my plans, and waited for the responses.

I’m in the planning stage of having a game day where I’ll introduce [Calfgrit10] and some of his friends to a classic game of Dungeons & Dragons. (Basic D&D, 1981 edition, if you are familiar with the game.) We want to invite [boy] to join us, if he’s interested. It’s looking like the best date would be July 23, for about 4 hours in the afternoon.

Please let me know if [boy] would be interested, and if that date is workable.

The first reply was an immediate and positive response from the dad whom I was hoping would join us. The second reply didn’t come until I had sent a follow up email several days later.

I got a phone call from the boy’s mother. She was “concerned” about the concept, as she didn’t have positive knowledge of D&D. “From what I remember about it, it was something that studious kids avoided,” she said.

Her husband had played D&D some time in the past, but she had no firsthand experience with it, herself. She said her son tended to get somewhat obsessed with video games he played, so she wanted to think about it and talk with her husband about whether D&D would be appropriate for their son. I supported her wanting to talk it out, and made no defense of the game other than to point out it is more social than most video games — he’d be playing with three or four other boys at the table.

The idea that some of the parents might have memories of the old 80’s urban myths about D&D being related to the occult, and players going insane, did cross my mind before I sent out the emails. So I had already given thought to whether to, and how to, defend it if I needed to. My decision was that I would not defend the game in an effort to get some parent’s permission for their son to play. I didn’t want to talk anyone into letting their child do something they weren’t sure about, even if their concern was based on completely untrue old scary myths. I figured the most defense I would give would be to invite the parents to join the game day if they wanted, even if they just hung out in the room with us and watched.

But even as I considered how to handle mythical worries, I thought, (read: hoped), that such silly ideas had already been sufficiently debunked just by the number of modern dads, (and maybe moms), who probably played the game in their younger, (or even current), years. But then, I should have realized that people who have not experienced D&D in any way, directly or indirectly, really have no basis on which to personally debunk any of the myths. I mean, unless you’ve swallowed Pop Rocks and Pepsi at the same time, how would you know the mixture wouldn’t kill you?

So, anyway, a few days later, the mom called back and explained that, although her husband backed up the fact that D&D is just a game, and nothing sinister in any way, their son won’t be participating in our game. They don’t want him obsessing over it like he has shown a propensity to do with video games. Fair enough. I have no problem with their decision.

The third boy we invited, I’ve had a hard time connecting with his mother. Her email bounced, and she hasn’t returned our phone call, yet. So we’ve got just one boy and dad so far planning to join our adventure afternoon. Calfgrit10 has given me another friend to invite, and I’ll be sending his parents an email tonight. I hope we can get some more takers. D&D is much more fun with a group of friends. Without the group dynamic, it looses a major enjoyment factor.

Bullgrit

We’re on vacation for a few days, at Wrightsville Beach. I’m writing this post actually before we get there, so it will be interesting to see how much my imaginings will match our actual days.

We’ll be leaving home in the morning, and so we’ll get to the area probably before our hotel room is ready. (It’s just a 2.5-hour drive to the beach.) While waiting for check-in time, we’ll go to the university campus, (University of North Carolina, Wilmington), where Cowgrit and I went to school. We’ll walk around, let the boys run around, and just see what’s new since our college days. From what I’ve heard, it’s very different.

Then we’ll probably get lunch at one of our [read: my] old favorite restaurants: the Oceanic. I love seafood, but no one else in my family does. So I rarely get any fish or shrimp, or the hushpuppies and cocktail sausce that goes with them. Not only does the Oceanic have great seafood, it’s perched right on the sand dunes overlooking the beach.

Then we’ll head on to our hotel, check in, take all our stuff up to our room, change into our bathing suits, slather on sunscreen, and head on out to the broad sandy beach. I love the smell of ocean air. The sound of waves crashing. The occasional cry of a seagull. My mom and step-dad took my brother and me to the beach over the weekend many times each summer when I was growing up. So when it was time for me to choose a college, the one within 10 minutes of the beach drew me like a bro to a beer.

After a long afternoon on the beach, we’ll retire back to our room for dinner. We’ll probably just order in something, or make something ourselves. Then we’ll watch a movie or some TV, maybe explore the hotel a bit, and then hit the beds, very tired.

The next day will have us doing whatever we feel like doing, whenever we feel like doing it. Breakfast in our room, then back to the beach, or maybe to the pool. Lunch may be a picnic outside. Then a swap of location — from beach to pool, or pool to beach. Mid-afternoon, we’ll head back to the room for an extended rest/nap before getting washed and dressed for a dinner out somewhere. Where, I don’t know, but not Moe’s, or Golden Corral, or CiCi’s pizza — this will not be a choice for the boys, this time.

The next day, we’ll get out to the beach or pool early for a few hours play before we have to check out of the hotel. After checkout, we’ll cruise around the beach town, walk out on a pier or two, look at the marina, grab lunch somewhere on the move, maybe check out a local store for some silly souvenir. We’ll head back into Wilmington, and maybe head down to the riverfront. I’d like to take the boys on the USS North Carolina battleship, but it will depend on our timing of everything before getting there. With or without the battleship tour, eventually we’ll hit the road for back to home.

I’m sure everyone will be tired, (the good kind of tired), and we’ll probably just relax at home until bed time. Then Real Life takes over again, and although the boys are starting their track out from school, I’ve got to go back to work.

Bullgrit

Over the months I’ve had my iPhone, I’ve picked up only a few games. I never intended to bother with games, or any apps, really, but it’s kind of easy to slowly collect them, just kind of impulse buys, (for free or 99 cents).

The first game I got was Pocket Frogs. One of Calfgrit10’s friends mentioned his dad had it on their iPad, and his dad lets him play it. I sort of took that as a personal challenge to my manhood, (actually more a challenge to my game geekitude). So I had to get it for my boys to play on my iPhone. I first just got the free version, but soon updated to the 99 cent full app.

There really isn’t all that much “game” to this app. You collect frogs, tapping them around a pond to eat flies, and then breed them to create more frogs. It’s an okay time waster, and the some of the many various frog breeds, (designs), are interesting, but there’s not really any kind of challenge or strategy to it. I really wouldn’t even call it a game.

A couple months later, I read a good reference to Angry Birds.

I downloaded the free version, and within a couple days, I beat those levels. I immediately downloaded the 99 cent levels. This is a true game. A truly challenging and maddeningly addictive game. I was so impressed with it, I gifted it to brogrit. I’ve long since beat all the levels, and now I’m going back through trying to get at least 2 stars (out of 3) on each level. Just when I think it’s impossible to do better than my highscore on a level, suddenly tactics and luck come together for a higher score with more stars.

Then a couple days ago, brogrit asked me if I had the Words app. I hadn’t even heard of it at that time, but I looked into it and downloaded the free version.

Brogrit challenged me to a first game, and within a couple turns, I’ve come to love this game.

It’s basically Scrabble, but strangely for a reader, writer, and editor, I’ve never actually played Scrabble. Now that I’m playing Words, (still on my first game with brogrit), I’m saddened to learn what I’ve been missing.

I must admit, too, that I felt like I had to do really good at this game versus my brother. A word game battle between a writer and a musician? Yeah, there’s some professional ego on the line, here.

To be honest, though, I really don’t use a lot of long words in my normal vocabulary. As you can see by reading this blog, hell, I don’t even use many long sentences. And surprising to me, playing Words doesn’t really lend itself well to playing long words, anyway. I’m surprised by how just 2- to 4-letter words are really the main tools.

And I’m not used to looking at words scrambled. I’m especially not used to figuring out words scrambled and mixed between letters in my hand and letters on a board. I can usually figure out a few words from the letters in my hand, but trying to figure how to fit them on the clustered board is crazy boggling.

And to make it even harder and more frustrating, every time I’ve figured out where I’m going to play my next word on the board, brogrit puts his word there and sets me back to figuring everything out all over again.

But I do love this game. I like playing a game with my brother, and with the way this lets you take turns as you get the time in your day, this is a perfect fit for playing with him. Even separated across different states, I almost feel like I’m just sitting across the kitchen table from him. This is a great way to stay connected.

Bullgrit