I Used to be a Gamer

Me and my boys were at a shopping center today, and Calfgrit7 asked if we could go into the video game store. I don’t know why he wanted to go in, and I don’t really know why I agreed, but the three of us entered. We don’t have a console system, and the only computer game I’ve played lately is World of Warcraft.

This made me realize that I’m not really much of a video gamer anymore. I’m more of a has-been video gamer. Since the Super Nintendo and Sega Genesis of the early ’90s, I’ve played very, very few console games. Past, say 1995, I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve played a console system. Although, I still own my old Super Nintendo (with only the Super Mario Cart game cartridge) and Sega Genesis (with only the Shadowrun cart.), sealed up in boxes at the back of my closet. [I pulled this out for my boys after our trip into the video game store — I’ll write about this experience for Monday.]

I have a shelf under my desk with at least half a dozen computer games — off the top of my head, I can think of Diablo I & II, Half-Life 1 & 2, Far Cry, F.E.A.R., DOOM 3, Guild Wars, and World of Warcraft plus it’s two expansions. But since I started WoW three or four years ago, I haven’t really played much of any other computer game. WoW takes a lot of time, and you never really “finish” it.

Before starting WoW, I’d play a game for a few months — finishing it and replaying it at least once — then I’d get another game. I played at least two new games a year. I know some would call that “barely a gamer,” but computer gaming was not my life, it was just a hobby for occasional escapism. (Table-top gaming had a deeper claim on my life.)

But now, other than the WoW expansions over the past couple of years, I haven’t bought or played a new computer game. And even at my most intense, I played WoW only twice, occasionally thrice, a week, for about 3-4 hours at a time. And now, even with getting the new Wrath of the Lich King expansion in November, I’ve maybe played it a total of 4 hours (outside riding around and exploring the world with my sons).

My main WoW character is still only level 70, and my new death knight character is only level 56. A couple of weeks ago, I canceled my subscription to WoW, and my time paid runs out this weekend. Now, I’ve canceled my account before, after reaching the top levels in the game, and I ended up back in the game after 3-6 months. But this is the first time I’ve canceled it before “finishing” it as a solo player.

Over the past year, I’ve done very little computer gaming at all. One of my friends loaned me Fallout 2 about three weeks ago, and I haven’t played 10 minutes of the game — I’ve really only installed it and started it to see what it looked like.

When I first came to this realization that I’m not doing any computer gaming lately, I felt a little saddened. What’s happened to me? I thought. I used to be “a computer gamer geek.” Computer games were part of my personality and character. But once I considered what has “happened” to me, I realize I’ve made a choice: to write (and work) on this web site every night instead of playing computer games.

And after thinking seriously about it for a while, I’ve come to realize that I like the choice I’ve made. I’ve really enjoyed writing (and working) on this web site. Not only am I doing something I enjoy doing, but I feel a sense of accomplishment looking back through the logs of this site that I never felt looking through the boxes of completed games on my desk shelf.

I do feel a sense of loss, though, over not playing computer games anymore. I’ve definitely “given up” something that has always been a part of my life — as far back as ZORK on my Commodore 64. But I guess I need to accept the fact that I’m no longer, currently a “computer gamer.” I’m just a “used to player.”

Do I have to turn in my membership card? Or can I just be put on reserve status?

Bullgrit