I am excited and apprehensive.

The movie website.

Captain America is my greatest hero. I respect him above any Star Wars or Star Trek character, and above any other superhero. This movie could be awesome, or it could be terrible. Sadly, from what I’ve seen produced by Hollywood in the past decade, I don’t give awesome a 50/50 chance. I don’t trust Hollywood with this kind of character.

I almost don’t want to even talk about this. Such is my great fear of it being total crap, and being a total rape of the Captain America story. As much as I would love to see a well-done Cap’n A movie, I also very much would tell Hollywood, “Don’t you dare put your shitty little hands on this icon.”

But it’s too late for that. It’s done. We’ll see what the result is in July.

Bullgrit

I love maps. Any and all maps, of any place.

One of the activities at Great Wolf Lodge is MagicQuest: a kind of magical scavenger hunt for kids. We didn’t play any of it, but many, many kids staying in the hotel did play it all around us. This is a big map on a foyer wall showing the fantasy land where MagicQuest takes place.

Bullgrit

Among the thrill slide choices at Great Wolf Lodge is the four-lane Mountain Edge Raceway with a digital timer at the end. As competitive as I am, this was calling my name more than the other slides.

The first time I went down, Calfgrit6 was in the lane beside me. I gave him a little push on his slick mat when the lifeguard said, “Ready, set, go!” and then I plopped chest down on my own mat and zipped down the chute.

Calfgrit6 emerged from the tunnel slide first, just ahead of me, but then I rocketed past him spraying water all around as I braked to a stop. He wanted to race again because, as he said, “I want to win.”

We jogged back up the staircase to the top of the slide and then took positions for another race. But I won again. I wanted to race like a daddy and let him win, but it’s not easy, (nor probably safe), to slow one’s self down when sliding down a wet plastic tube on a slick foam mat. The little guy had to admit he was far outclassed, (because I outweigh him by a hundred pounds), on that race track, and so he gave up interest in that slide. We moved on to the other thrills.

But later, when he was playing with his big brother in the wave pool, overwatched by their mother, I went back to the race slide for a little self-competition.

The park wasn’t very crowded, so there wasn’t a line for the slide, and most “races,” I went down all by myself. My challenge was against the timer at the end. After a couple times down, getting a time of around 10 seconds, I asked the lifeguard what a fast time was.

“You have to get at least 9.5 or 9.3.” So 9.3 became my goal.

After another couple times down, I had pretty much figured out some good speed tactics. I’d stand at the beginning, rather than lay down, and when the lifeguard at the top/beginning of the slide called out, “Go!” I threw myself into the tunnel. I had to stay crouched pretty low to avoid bashing my head on the top of the tunnel entrance.

At one point, I threw myself forward so enthusiastically that when I came down on my mat, the upturned front of the mat caught me right in the throat. I was gagging all the way down, but I still managed to beat even 9.0 seconds, (8.81 to be exact), on that run.

Another time going down, when my mat went up on the side of the tunnel through a turn, I rolled off the mat. It wasn’t until I blasted out of the tunnel like the last piece of cereal tumbling out of the box, near the end of the slide, where the bottom drops out from under the rider, giving me several inches of room for mat replacement, that I was able to get the mat back under me. Just in time to protect myself from the rippled plastic “brakes” at the very end of the slide.

I took a break from the racing after an 8.02 seconds run. A couple hours later, I wanted to try at least one more run to maybe get under 8 seconds. Again, I was the lone rider in the “race.” I told the beginning lifeguard that I was trying to best 8 seconds. He said, “OK, let’s see what we can do.”

That run down the slide came in at 6.50 seconds. Holy crap! Six and a half seconds!?

When I told the beginning lifeguard my time, he said, “I told you I’d help you out.” That statement raised my suspicions. After that next run, I asked the lifeguard at the end of the slide exactly how the race is timed. I had been assuming that a sensor at the beginning and end of the slide marked the start and finish of the race. Sadly, no. There is a sensor at the finish line, but the timer is started by the beginning lifeguard, manually.

I was disappointed. I thought I had been participating in a fair race against a fair clock. But, sadly, really I had just been running against whatever approximation of fairness the beginning lifeguard, (different guards at different times), felt like setting. That last, 6.5 second, result was just the beginning lifeguard cheating for me.

Sigh.

That really annoyed me. I’m too damn competitive for my own good. And apparently too damn naive.

Well, even if the “racing” aspect of the slide was a sham, I did have fun flying down that wet chute and rocketing out of the tunnel like a human cannonball. The ride was fun even if the results were bogus.

Bullgrit

We just got back from a mini vacation to Great Wolf Lodge. We spent two nights at the resort, giving us a half day, a full day, and another half day of indoor pool fun. Although I had read their web site, and knew generally what the whole concept was, I was even more impressed with the actual experience.

The big wave pool was the main fun for the boys. The various water slides were my favorite, (especially the Tornado). There’s a big ol’ wet playset/fort that played second favorite for everyone, and also another, non-wave, pool that got a little attention, here and there.

The playset/fort had a huge water bucket on top that would, every few minutes, dump a ton, (probably literally), of water down on the waiting crowd below. A bell would start ringing about 30 seconds before the water dump, and this would call all the kids, and many adults, (myself included), from all over the park to the target area. For something really so very simple, it was hilariously fun. People not interested in getting drenched by the pounding torrent would still turn and watch it every time the bell started sounding.

Right after each bucket dump, I’d go back over to the water slides. Calfgrit6 would sometimes go with me, and he loved the thrills. (Calfgrit10 is not so much into thrill rides, so he never joined us for any sliding.) As much fun as the slides were with Calfgrit6, the one I loved the most, CG6 was too small for: the Howlin’ Tornado. When the little Calfgrit was happy with the other water zones, I went back and back and back to the Tornado. I lost track of my times after 9.

The only bad thing about the whole water park experience is that I don’t like cold water. The park and water is supposedly kept at 84 degrees, but that means the water is over 10 degrees cooler than my body temperature. To me, that feels cold.

In the summer, I generally don’t get in the water — ocean, lake, or pool —  if the air temp is less than 90 degrees. And I prefer the water temp to have time to warm up over several hot days before jumping in. The Calfgrits seem completely comfortable jumping right into cool water, but it took me several minutes to acclimate. And it was about an hour before I felt comfortably comfortable going in and out of the various pools. And then, a break for lunch or dinner would set me right back to finding the water just too cold.

But even with the water coldness, the mini vacation was pretty darn fun. I’ll fill in some details soon.

Bullgrit