Nothing

I’m sitting here trying to think of something interesting to post about. (Interesting? I’ve never limited myself to writing about something interesting for past posts.) Hmm. What to write about?

How about something funny? But nothing particularly funny has happened.

How about exciting? Meh. Nothing exciting has happened.

So I’ve got nothing good to write about. Good? That’s it! If nothing good has happened, maybe something bad has happened.

Think. . . . Damn. Nothing bad has happened either.

I’ve got nothing to write about. Just nothing. Nothing at all. Not a thing. Zero, zilch, nada. Nil. (Did you know “nil” is the British term for zero? It is. And that’s what I’ve got to write about.)

With nothing interesting in this post, what am I going to do to keep you reading? I’ve got to do something, or you’ll leave this site and go read something else. Or go watch TV. Or actually get some work done (if you read this from your office).

I shouldn’t just waste your time with useless rambling. It’s a waste of my time writing useless rambling, too. But then again, most of my posts are useless ramblings, and you read them. And then some of you come back the next day to read more ramblings.

Is my rambling that entertaining, or is your time that free? I like to think my rambling is just that entertaining. My words just captivate your attention, and you just keep reading in amazement.

I have control of your eyes and mind right now. I’m saying nothing of interest, but you just keep reading this page. Keep reading. Keep reading. See?

You’re probably having to scroll down the page to keep reading this drivel, but you just can’t stop. You’re fascinated by my words. Entranced by my sentences. In awe of my linguistic abilities.

Or maybe you really are just totally bored. Or you’re grasping at any reason to not get to work on what you’re supposed to be doing right now. Or maybe you’re perversely curious about just how long I’ll continue to write nonsense junk.

Maybe I should stop with the silliness and write something at least vaguely interesting.

. . .

I got nothing.

Sorry.

Bullgrit
bullgrit@totalbullgrit.com