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I’m the Worst Daddy

Last night, Calfgrit9 wanted some time to play alone in his room. So Calfgrit5 and I played together. We had a lengthy sword fight with our foam swords (bought from the Lego store in Downtown Disney). Then he rode on my back as a knight on his horse. This went on for 30 to 45 minutes until I needed to answer the phone.

While I was on the phone, CG5 went to his room to play with his Legos and Lincoln Logs. After a while, I gave the five-minute warning for bath time. The five minutes passed quickly, and he wasn’t ready to stop playing when I started his bath water.

He got right pissed when I turned on the stern-daddy voice, “It’s time for bath. You’ve had plenty of time to play, and you can play some more after bath if you don’t take too long with this.”

“Baths are stupid,” he said.

“Now, we don’t use that word,” I said.

“I don’t want a bath. I haven’t had time to build anything,” he argued.

“If you don’t come and get in the bath right now,” I warned, “you won’t have time to play after. And if you’re going to be bad, we won’t read a book before bed. You’ll just go straight to bed.”

“Nooooo!” he shouted in agony. (No book before bed is a sad punishment in this house.)

“Come on!” I raised my voice.

He stomped into the bathroom, and started taking off his clothes.

“You’re a bad daddy,” he said. “You’re the worst daddy, ever!”

I got him into the bath tub, and since he refused to wash himself, I had to soap him up and rinse him off, myself. He pouted and whined the whole time. He reiterated and confirmed my bad daddiness. I was “the worst daddy ever in a million years.”

When he was clean, I had to threaten the no book before bed punishment again to get him to get out of the water. As I dried him off, he asked, “Will you build a Lincoln Log house for me?”

“Do bad daddies build Lincoln Log houses?” I asked.

He looked at me with the towel draped over his head, and said, “I’m sorry.”

“Mm hmm,” I grunted. “Can you put on your pajamas without an argument?”

“Sure,” he said. He was suddenly a totally different child.

I built a Lincoln Log house with him before he got in bed. I don’t know if I’m a bad daddy, a good daddy, or just a sucker.


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