America Celebrates a Butt Kicking
Categories: LifeToday we celebrate our nation’s 231st year of independence. Isn’t it ironic that the nation our ancestors fought a long and difficult war against to gain independence from is now our most loyal ally? That nation also, a few years after that war, burned our nation’s capital to the ground. And yet, today we can count on it to stand beside us at all times. Now that’s a friend.
The United Kingdom is like an older friend who beat the crap out of us when we were young, but respected us when we fought back—especially when we fought back well. Today is the day we remember that whoopin’.
US: “Remember that time I blacked your eye and busted your lip?”
UK: “Yes, I remember it. That was a bloody good fight. But you only got out of that headlock because France flashed her knickers to distract me. I also remember the time I knocked you on your bum with that thump to the head.”
US: “Yeah, that was a sneaky sucker punch. But I almost broke your arm when I got back up. Good times.”
UK: “Jolly good times, indeed.”
Celebrate this day well. We fought off the greatest power in the world of the time and then stood up on our own to become the United States of America.
Bullgrit
bullgrit@totalbullgrit.com
