The First Thing to Go

Over the past year and more, I’ve noticed my eyesight becoming poor. I’ve always had excellent vision; through the years, I’ve bragged about being able to read the line below the 20/20 line on the standard vision test charts. A couple of years ago, I would have named my sight as my best physical ability.

My weakening vision has been slowly breaking my heart. I can’t see any distance as well as I used to could, but it’s my near sight that has deteriorated the most. As a writer and editor, I read all day long. And actually, since most of my reading is done off a computer monitor, it’s remarkable that my eyesight didn’t start failing sooner. I can still see and read a computer monitor without a problem, but reading print on a page is difficult.

When I read any kind of printed text, I have to hold the object out, away from my face. If the lighting is bad, or if it’s early in the morning or late at night, my vision is so bad that I can hardly read at all. Reading small-print instructions on food packages in the morning or evening is next to impossible.

I went to an optometrist several months ago to see what kind of eyeglasses prescription I needed. The doctor said my situation was perfectly normal for a man around 40. He gave me a prescription and sat me down with a glasses salesperson.

I didn’t want to buy glasses at that time because I wasn’t emotionally sold on the idea that I needed them. At least, I didn’t think I needed “real” eyeglasses. I ended up buying some cheap reading glasses from Target; I was only willing to try out the glasses idea for a test.

At first, the difference with and without the glasses was not drastic. I could read without the glasses, but text was blurry. Looking through the glasses did help, but not enough to sell me on the idea that I needed them. I kept the glasses in my bedroom over the past several months and I’ve used them occasionally. Over this time, I’ve come to accept their aid more often. I still don’t feel a strong need for them, yet, but I can admit that they do make reading more and more easy.

But there have been a couple of times recently, when I’ve tried to read something in especially fine print, and I’ve seen the proof that eyeglasses are becoming a need. I was making some Pillsbury cinnamon rolls for the family breakfast on a Saturday morning, and I couldn’t read the cook time. It was early in the morning, when my eyes were still weak from having just awakened, and the lighting in the kitchen was not bright enough. I had to go back to my bedroom to find my glasses.

It was that moment that my resistance to the idea of wearing glasses finally broke. Now I’ve actually taken and worn my glasses (still the cheap Target reading glasses) to a game night with my friends. I may actually have to take them to work with me, now.

Not to sound all melodramatic about it, but this really is starting to bug me. Not only do I just not think of myself as a guy who wears glasses, but having to keep up with the things isn’t easy for someone not used to it. I’m now considering buying a few more sets of the cheap glasses so I can have them in several places without needing to remember to take them with me. And, dammit, it’s heartbreaking to have one’s strongest physical ability start becoming the weakest.

Bullgrit
bullgrit@totalbullgrit.com